If the traditional financial script has never felt like it was written for you — you’re right. The standard advice around legacy, retirement, and wealth-building assumes everyone wants the same things: a house, kids, college funds, and a beneficiary with the same last name. But what if that’s not your story? I sat down with Bri Conn, CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER® and co-host of the Child-Free Life by Design podcast, to talk about what financial planning actually looks like when children aren’t part of the equation. This conversation is for every child-free person who’s been told they’re doing money wrong — and needs someone to finally tell them they’re not.
Meet Bri Conn: The CFP Who Gets It
Bri didn’t set out to become the go-to financial planner for the child-free community. Like a lot of great career pivots, it happened by accident — she found a Facebook group, connected with Dr. JR, founder of Child-Free Wealth, and asked for the job. They clicked. The rest is history.
Today, Bri runs two specialized platforms. At Child-Free Wealth, she helps clients build comprehensive financial lives centered on autonomy and personal fulfillment. At Child-Free Trust, she makes estate planning accessible for people who don’t have traditional heirs — with professional fiduciary trustees available in all 50 states. She’s also co-host of the Child-Free Life by Design podcast and one of the clearest voices for a community that’s too often ignored by the standard financial conversation.
“People talk about a dream job — I’m living mine. I get to do this every day and I love it.”
And you can feel it in the way she talks about her work. This isn’t just a niche. It’s a calling.
The One Question That Changes Everything
Before Bri builds a single financial plan, she asks her clients one question:
“Do you care about how much money you leave behind when you die?”
If the answer is no — everything shifts. You’re no longer optimizing for a generational legacy. You’re optimizing for a life you actually live. That’s the Die with Zero philosophy, from Bill Perkins’ book of the same name: spending down your money intentionally over time, investing in experiences and people and joy rather than stockpiling wealth to pass on.
For child-free people who don’t care about leaving behind a specific dollar amount, this reframes the entire conversation. Investing isn’t just about the stock market. It might mean funding a sabbatical. Taking the job that pays less but brings more fulfillment. Building a life you’re excited to wake up to — not just one you’re surviving until retirement.
Redefining Legacy When Children Aren’t Part of the Plan
One of the things I love most about this conversation is how Bri approaches the idea of legacy. Because family is not the only way to define it.
She shared a story that stuck with me: a client who said she didn’t care if people knew her name — she just wanted people to come to her garden, see the bright colors, and stop to smell the flowers she’d planted. That’s a legacy. That’s impact. That’s something worth building toward.
“It’s taking time. Some people know immediately what they want. Others need space to figure it out — and that’s okay.”
Legacy can look like a community you’ve poured into, friendships you’ve built with intention, a cause you’ve championed, or a business you’ve grown. It doesn’t need a birth certificate attached to it.
Cultural Expectations, Family Obligation, and the Family ATM Myth
Here’s one I hear all the time — and I have a lot of feelings about it: just because you don’t have kids, people assume you have endless disposable income and the unlimited bandwidth to financially support everyone around you. You are not the default family ATM. Full stop.
Bri walks her clients through some hard but necessary questions: What are your limits with parents and family members you may be caring for? If you’re in a relationship, what do you and your partner agree to give in terms of time, money, and energy? Can family members move in — or not?
“Would you rather disappoint mom and dad, or disappoint yourself?”
That question is uncomfortable. But it’s also one of the most clarifying things you can ask. And for folks in Latinx and BIPOC communities where those cultural expectations can run especially deep — it’s worth sitting with.
Bri also points out that financial support doesn’t always mean writing checks. Hiring a care manager, paying for groceries, or covering a house cleaner are all ways to show up for aging parents without completely draining your own plan. Starting those conversations before a crisis hits makes all the difference.
Estate Planning Without Default Heirs
This is where things get really important — and where a lot of child-free people are dangerously underprepared.
If you don’t have estate documents in place, the state decides who makes decisions for you. And that process — called intestate succession — follows a chart that doesn’t care about your relationships, your values, or your wishes. It goes to your closest living relative, even if you’re estranged, even if you’ve never met them.
“I always say there’s always somebody in the family you don’t want making decisions for you.”
So what do you actually need?
- A will — documenting where your assets go
- Medical power of attorney — who makes healthcare decisions if you can’t
- Financial power of attorney — who manages your finances if you’re incapacitated
- A trust — and a professional fiduciary trustee if you don’t have a trusted person to fill that role
Bri built Child-Free Trust specifically for people who don’t have someone obvious to put in those roles. It’s available in all 50 states and takes the guesswork out of a process that can feel overwhelming when you’re doing it solo.
Her homework assignment for you right now: Google your state’s intestacy chart. Look at who would be assigned to make decisions for you under the default law. If those aren’t the people you’d choose — and for most of us, they’re not — it’s time to get your documents done.
“But Who’s Going to Take Care of You When You’re Old?”
Oh, that question. People love to ask it like it’s a gotcha. Let’s actually answer it.
Long-term care currently costs around $129,000 per year — and that number is rising by about 5% annually. Women average 3.7 years of care. Men average 2.2. For child-free people without a built-in caregiver, planning for this isn’t optional.
Bri walks through three main approaches:
- Self-funding — saving and investing specifically to cover long-term care costs out of pocket
- Long-term care insurance — ideally purchased in your mid-40s, before you’re too expensive to insure or ineligible due to a health condition
- Medicaid — an option, but not a reliable standalone plan given ongoing coverage changes
Bri also notes that some people are factoring in right-to-die options in states where that’s available — and while that’s a deeply personal decision, it’s a legitimate part of the conversation.
The earlier you start planning, the more options you have. Waiting until you’re sick or older significantly reduces both your choices and your ability to afford them.
Life Insurance: Do Child-Free People Actually Need It?
Short answer: probably less than you think.
For child-free people who are financially stable and independent, life insurance is often less of a priority than long-term care insurance or disability insurance. If you’re a solo person with no one financially depending on you, a traditional life insurance policy likely doesn’t need to be part of your plan.
However, there are cases where it makes sense — if you’re in a couple where one partner has a significantly larger income, or if inheritance structures mean a surviving spouse might not be protected. In those cases, Bri always recommends term life insurance, not whole or universal.
Building Your Bench
Bri uses this phrase I love: building your bench. Your bench is the team of people and professionals who are in your corner and documented in your plan.
It includes:
- Medical professionals who understand your situation
- The people named in your estate documents — your medical POA, financial POA, and trustee
- Financial planners and advisors who actually get child-free planning
That last one matters a lot. If your financial planner looks at you sideways when you say you’re not having kids, that’s a red flag. If they say you’ll probably change your mind — that’s a bigger one. You need someone who’s willing to take your life as it actually is and build a plan around it.
“You are the one paying their bills. You can stop that at any time if they’re not listening to you.”
Bri says the best planners will either already know how child-free planning changes the equation — or will be transparent about being willing to learn. Either is acceptable. Dismissal is not.
FIRE vs. FILE: Financial Independence Live Early
You’ve heard of FIRE — Financial Independence, Retire Early. Grind hard, accumulate a number, quit cold turkey. For some people, that’s the dream. For a lot of others? Not so much.
Enter FILE: Financial Independence Live Early. The goal isn’t to work as hard as possible so you can stop working entirely. It’s to redesign your work life now so you can actually enjoy the ride.
That might mean cutting your hours. Stepping back from a leadership role into a position with less stress. Stacking your schedule to work two weeks on, two weeks off. Making a lateral move into a role that pays the same but gives you your life back.
“If you never ask, the answer will definitely be no. But if you do ask — companies want to retain good people.”
The FILE model recognizes something FIRE sometimes misses: we don’t have an unlimited amount of time, money, or health at any given point in our lives. The goal is to balance those three things so that your overall life — not just your retirement years — is actually worth living.
Myth-Busting Child-Free Financial Advice
A few things Bri wants everyone to stop believing:
Myth: Child-free people automatically have a ton of money.
Life expenses don’t discriminate based on whether you have kids. Healthcare crises, job loss, family struggles — none of that is tied to your parenting status. If you’re child-free and still struggling financially, you are not the only one. That pressure to “have it all figured out” because you don’t have kids is false and unfair.
Myth: You need to keep working until you’ve hit a huge retirement number.
Bri says this is the worst financial advice child-free people are constantly given — being pushed to keep accumulating when they already have enough to start spending it. If you’ve said you don’t care about leaving money behind, and you have enough to live on, why are you still grinding?
Myth: You have to buy a house.
Homeownership is not a mandatory milestone. Child-free people who value flexibility, mobility, and the ability to try different places have every reason to keep renting — especially in a market where buying doesn’t always mean building equity. I built a multiple six-figure portfolio as a renter. The math works.
What Wealth Actually Means When You’re Child-Free
I asked Bri what wealth means to her as a child-free person. Her answer had nothing to do with a number.
“It’s the ability to say yes. To get there and be there for the people who matter to me. To celebrate things. To travel, to show up, to not have to ask ‘can I afford that?'”
She’s built a community of friends across major US cities — people she can call and grab lunch with, travel with, celebrate with. That’s the rich life. And it’s one built intentionally, not accidentally.
Just because you’re child-free doesn’t mean you don’t have people to show up for. You just get to decide who those people are.
Key Takeaways
- Ask yourself: do you care how much money you leave behind when you die? Your answer reshapes your entire financial plan.
- Legacy doesn’t require children. Define it on your own terms.
- You are not the family ATM. Set your limits — with your family and with yourself.
- Long-term care costs ~$129,000/year and rises 5% annually. Plan for it in your mid-40s, not later.
- Get your estate documents done — a will, medical POA, financial POA, and trust. Google your state’s intestacy chart today.
- Build your bench: the right medical professionals, estate document decision-makers, and a financial planner who actually gets it.
- FILE (Financial Independence Live Early) is an alternative to FIRE — redesign work now instead of quitting cold turkey later.
- Homeownership is not a requirement. Renting is a valid wealth-building strategy.
- If your financial planner dismisses your child-free status — find a new one. You’re the one paying their bills.
- Permission granted: want freedom, happiness, and a fully expressed life — without apologizing for any of it.
Resources Mentioned
Childfree Insights: childfreeinsights.com
Child-Free Wealth: childfreewealth.com
Child-Free Trust: childfreetrust.com
Child-Free Life by Design Podcast: find it at childfreeinsights.com
Die with Zero by Bill Perkins: https://www.amazon.com/Die-Zero-Getting-Your-Money/dp/0358567092
Financially Lit! by Jannese Torres: financiallylitbook.com
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